Urban Epic Race Report

Team Triple Threat: Lorenzo (Alina's brother), the hub., Alina


Me and the Hub. post-race

Just for the record, I was NOT supposed to do this race. It wasn’t in the plan, and until I found out that Clearwater was such a slim possibility, I didn’t even consider racing it. But when Clearwater DID become unlikely, I began to realize that Urban Epic and the local races might be as important to me as Timberman 70.3. It’s local, all of my tri and swim friends, new and old and including the hub., were doing it. I really wanted to be a part of the fun. Also, I had some race strategies I wanted to try out. I did some experimenting and practicing and it paid off, I think. I learned a lot.

We had to rack our bikes the night before the race. I actually like to do this. It’s one less thing to think about in the morning. Alina and I showed up with two of my kids in tow to catch the pre-race meeting Tri-ME was having to explain the course and to rack our bikes. (Alina competed in relay with her brother and the (my) hub. She was racking her bro’s bike for him.)

I checked in, got my number and then we listened to what the race director had to stay. Swim: strong current, new course, blah blah, stay right, blah, blah. Bike: be careful. Big descent early on that later you must climb (this turned out to be the understatement of the century), lots of potholes, city streets, be careful blah blah, Run: nice and flat—only 5.7, not 6.2.

I half listened. It would be fine. Just follow everyone else, that’s what I do.

I should have listened more carefully. Oops.

Anyway. I went to rack my bike. All good. I placed my seat on the rack and wham! My seat post slid to the top. I took my bike off the rack and examined the offending seat post. It slid up and down. The clamp was not holding the post in place. WTF?

I panicked. Luckily I hung out with EXACTLY the right people last weekend at L.P., the very people who could help me and the very people who were right there, ready to help! I had Alina run to get Tim, one of the owners of Peak Performance in Portland. He examined my seat post, removed the clamp. As he removed it fell apart in his hand. The metal had split clean in half. Apparently this might be because it was clamped too tightly, but nothing is certain.

In a very calm voice he said, “Okay, Mary. This clamp is broken. I need to go to the shop to get a new clamp for you.”

At first I was like, Fuck! My kids are here! I was supposed to be home by 7! This is serious! It can’t just be fixed right here!

Then I settled. Just a clamp. Can be replaced. And, most importantly, here was this super nice person offering to save my ass. Thank you, God. Thank you, Tim!

I hung out as Nat, the mechanic, drove down to the store to get the part. Then, later, I watched as he carefully replaced it and carefully placed my seat in the exact place it had been before. I wanted to kiss the whole crew from Peak Performance. What a close call. Can you imagine if that clamp had broken apart on the course during the race? Disaster narrowly averted! Peak Performance will have my eternal loyalty and devotion. Thank you Tim and Nat!


The next morning the hub and I rose early and silently crept out of the house. Lauren, my superstar cousin/nanny was taking care of the kiddos during the race. I had a Luna bar and we stopped to get coffee. I have graduated from egg, cheese and sausage on an English to a Luna bar and coffee. Not bad, huh? Ha ha! We got to the race site and met up with Ange and Alina. Also there were tons of acquaintances and friends. It was really fun to know so many people.

The swim was point to point. It began at Mackworth Island and ended at East End Beach in Portland. It was advertised as 1.5K, but in truth was about 1.5 miles. This was fine by me. I love the swim! This would give me a chance to get out ahead of some of the super fast woman competing in the race.

Although Ange and Alina are both 35-39 AG, they weren’t in my wave for this race. Ange was placed in the Elite wave which started the race (Go, Ange!) and Alina was doing a relay so she began 3 minutes behind me. Although Alina and I had practiced the swim for this race the week before, neither of us was feeling overly confident as the elites went off. This is because at the last minute they changed the entire swim course! This time we would leave from the opposite side of the island and face a massive current.

We had been warned repeatedly that the current was strong. We could avoid this, though. We had to swim out to the red buoys, straight ahead, and then the current would sweep us up and basically carry us the next mile to the finish.

Ummm. Right.
Didn’t work out like that.

The elites were first.
Sucks to be elite.

They tried to swim to the red buoys. They were off course. They were more off course. They were SO OFF COURSE there was no way they were going to make it to those red buoys! Finally, they began to try to swim against the current toward the buoys. They swam in place. It was fascinating to watch. Really. They literally could not budge! One elite swimmer finally made it and turned around it. He (or she) got beyond the buoy and then it was like Bang! He/she was shot from a canon into the current. The whole AG crowd on the beach ahhhhhed in unison. It was amazing! One by one the elites struggled around the buoy and were shot into the current at lightening speed. One elite just wasn’t making it, though. He was struggling in place and it didn’t look like he’d ever get to the buoy. I couldn’t watch it was so upsetting. Later, I would pass this guy. n the swim.

The race director made a snap decision. The Age Groupers would not head to the red buoys. They would swim straight out, grab the current and then aim for the next set of buoys further down the swim course. There was certainly no argument from us! No way did I want to fight Mother Nature on this one!

When it was finally my wave’s turn to go I was ready. My thought was that I would get out front and keep swimming to the right until the first set of buoys we had to go through were close by. Alternatively, I would find a fast blue cap from my wave who seemed to have a good strategy and follow him/her. This is what I ended up doing. Worked great.

Right before the swim started I turned to the guy next to me. We had both creeped out ahead of everyone else-- A mark of a confident swimmer. “Are you a superstud swimmer?” I asked. “You bet,” he said. “Good,” I said. “I’m following you.” Then the race director shouted for us to go.

I followed said dude. I couldn’t really draft him. He was just ahead of me—but not too close. Perfect, however, as a moving sight marker. I just looked for his blue cap every time I sighted. Worked like a charm.

The swim took me close to 34 minutes. It took some swimmers over an hour. Some 1.5 K swim! Ha ha!

After the swim I staggered onto the beach and looked around frantically for the hub. There he was. Yes! I screamed, Hi! And ran on. The fact that he was there meant that Alina had not passed me! I knew there was a good chance that she would. She is an awesomely fast swimmer. But she didn’t. She finished a minute and a half faster than me, but she did not pass me! Yeah me!

There was a .65 mile run to T1. The run was significant enough that they had us do a mini-transition right at the beach. We had to find our white trash bag with our number on it, pull out our running shoes, and stuff the wetsuit, cap and goggles into the bag. I was worried about this little mini-transition. How would I find my bag amongst the hundreds of other white trash bags? But it worked out. It usually does.
T1 time: 6:56

At T1.5 I pulled off my shoes, stuffed my feet into my bike shoes and pushed my new pointy helmet on my head. I felt pretty dumb about the pointy helmet. I need all the help on the bike I can get on the bike, which is why I got it, but I'm not a super good biker, and I didn't want others to wonder why such a lame cyclist had treated herself to one! Anyway. I carefully mounted my bike and began to ride up the winding hill onto the course.

I admit it. I am a chicken on the bike. Within a mile there was a really steep descent that ended at an intersection where cars were zipping past. I braked the whole way down. No way was a bombing down this hill straight into traffic! After this crazy descent the course wove its way through city streets; streets with potholes, grates, manhole covers jutting out, rocks, glass--you name it. Also, there were cars everywhere. We must have crossed a dozen intersections--all of which were manned by policeman and volunteers-- but that wasn't enough to stop my heart from racing at each one and my legs from braking until I was going about 2 mph. Finally we left the city and began riding on slightly less trafficked roads. This race definitely was urban, I'll say that.

My average pace at this point was 17 mph. Not even funny. I started to push harder to make up lost time. Then I slowed again. The plan was not to hammer to make up lost time. The plan was to practice: practice pacing for my 1/2 Iron coming, practice being disciplined about sipping my drink and taking in gels. Disciplined about not letting a slow start ruin my careful and thoughtful race plan. But I wanted to hammer. 17 mph. You had to be kidding me!

Also, I was alone. I had been alone since the start of the bike--so much so that I often contemplated whether I was going the right way. Right at the beginning of the bike I had passed one woman and one man had passed me, but I hadn't seen a soul since then. I tried to push it harder now that I was out in the open, but it was difficult. I felt as if I was on a training ride.

I rode that way for some time. I had gotten a big enough lead on my AG in the swim that I didn't see any of them for a long time. About 25 minutes into the ride my former next door neighbor and former babysitter growing up passed me at lightening speed. I knew she would. I was just waiting for it. She smiled and we exchanged niceties. A few AG men from the wave that had started ahead of me passed me too. I was getting passed a lot. Sort of deflating. It's great to be fast out of the water, but kind of sucky when your bike isn't nearly as strong as your swim!

At the half way point we entered a lolly-pop turn around. I shifted into granny keep safe mindset again. Have I mentioned I also brake for every turn, especially left-handed turns? Argh. The second AG woman from my wave passed me then; Carrie. She is a serious rock star cyclist. In fact, she had the fastest bike split of the day for women, including Becky Lavelle and the other pros! (Granted, Lavelle did get a flat, but there were other pros in the race as well.) She sailed passed me and I wondered if she'd catch Erin. Those two are pretty competitive, but Erin seems to usually come out on top. Maybe not today. Carrie was moving!

The rest of the ride was uneventful until I hit the steep descent (now an ascent) that had welcomed me into the ride. Oh My God. I don't think I've ever been closer to teetering over on the bike. If my average mph was slow from being cautious, it was going to be seriously pathetic following this hill! Volunteers stood at the top ringing cowbells, but they couldn't drown out the sound of my heaving breath as I tried to crest the damn thing!

Finishing the bike I knew I must be 3rd or 4th woman overall, not including the elites, like ANGE. :) A bunch of men, but only three women (that I counted) passed me. The bike had been 26 miles as opposed to the 40K, advertised, but this didn't surprise me. The 1.5K swim was actually 1.5 miles and the run was reportedly quite shy of a 6.2, plus they had that weird .65 run to T1. Not exactly an Olympic distance race at all.

The advantage of having been downright pathetically conservative on the bike is that I had a pretty strong run. It wasn't ripping fast, but it was steady and in control. I felt tired but confident during the whole thing and I finished it in about 7:09 pace, which is pretty good for me; about 10 seconds per mile slower than my regular 10K pace. I was pleased. I had enough gas to be silly at the finish. We'll see how those pictures turn out!

At the finish I found the hub, Alina and her brother Lorenzo. They had crushed the relay field by more than 10 minutes. They seriously were a Triple Threat (their team name). Alina had the 2nd fastest swim split of the relay competitors and the hub. had the fastest run split. Lorenzo was 4th, I think, on the bike. Pretty awesome.


Then Tim walked up to us(Tim who had helped me the night before) and told us the bad news. Ange had crashed on the bike.

My heart dropped. Was it bad? Was she okay? Did she finish? Alina assured me that she had finished--that she had looked strong and that she hadn't noticed her looking injured. Then Ange limped over.

Her shoulder was taped up and she had nasty bloody scrapes all over her arm. She also looked a little stunned. She explained that she had nearly missed a turn at mile 4 and had to brake very hard, very suddenly. She flipped over the bars. No one was around. Had it been me, I would have sat there until discovered, and then I would have dropped out of the race. Not Ange. She got back on that bike and finished with a bike split much faster than mine. The girl amazes me. She then went on to pass several of her elite competitors on the run, running would had to be close to 6 min. pace. She finished fifth among woman. The top three women (including Lavelle) were pros. The other woman, a local athlete that is really good, was third overall. Ange would have been faster than this woman had she not crashed. But you wait. She's going to get her next time.

We stood around for awhile waiting for the awards. Because Ange had raced as an elite she was out of the AG running, and so therefore I was 2nd in my AG. Carrie, the girl of fastest bike split fame, was first. I was the fifth non-elite woman overall. I was 12th woman overall including the elites. I'm pretty proud.

Final times and places:
225 competitors
Age Group: 2/13
swim--about 1.5 miles: 33:58 rank: 19/225
bike--1:20:54 boo! 19.1 mph rank: 80/225
run--40:45 rank: 38/225

Think my ride was a little too in control. Claire, I really need your help!
It was a great race.